Books and Ballpoints

I don’t remember the last morning I had to myself. Maybe before my kiddo was born? Yet, there I was with 3 and a half hours on my plate and no obligations, errands, or expectations to meet. It was honestly odd. I felt exposed, vulnerable even to have so much freedom. I’m used to structure so deciding where to go and when on my own terms is almost too much to handle.

After painstakingly considering all my possibilities I decided I would go to the most magical place I could think of. The book store. Barnes & Noble’s was calling my name like a whisper on the wind.

The calm quiet aisles patiently waited for me to browse their contents and the pleasurable aroma of fresh coffee and book pages filled the air when I walked in.

I was home.

I found so many treats! First was guided journals. I have an obsession with these. I love journaling but often find blank empty space between my pen and the pages when I start. These guided journals just pour inspiration right into my soul and beckon thoughts onto their open pages. It’s external motivation at its finest.

I didn’t find any that caught my eye right off the bat but ended up browsing through all of them. There are two on my future purchase lists. Both are story writing prompt books! Someday I’ll have to indulge but they were a bit pricey for today’s impromptu visit.

I meandered through every section. I was looking for something on writing and how to be a better blogger. I didn’t find zilch and was too antisocial to ask the staff. They were super nice but it was only 9am and I’m still half zombie that early.

After nothing about writing jumping into my arms I just started wandering. Unless a book is recommended to me, I usually don’t stray from my comfortable genres. I get this weird book anxiety about reading new things. If I don’t like it, I wasted time and money that could have gone to books I know I like. On the other hand, who knows what wonderful, amazing worlds I’m missing out on?! It’s an agonizing, paralyzing circle of thoughts.

Today, I focused on just enjoying myself though and tried to quickly avert my mind from the blossoming panic. For once, it worked. I perused each aisle as smoothly as a dandelion fluff being wafted by a breeze.

I found an end-cap filled with books about inner zen and peace. That alone sounded sweet and welcoming. Immediately my eye was caught by a beautiful water color, galaxy-like color scheme.

I should be forth-coming here, I have a potty-mouth. In real life, I cuss a lot. It’s not a great habit but sometimes a well placed F bomb is as therapeutic as an actual therapy session.

Of course, books that blatantly drop their own F bombs always amuse me. They’re so unexpected but welcomed in a world where everything has become persistently PC. A bold guided journal on inner peace and zen had found its way to this end-cap and my heart.

I needed it. I now own it. There was no way I was walking out without this book!

I was thrilled to find such a unique, amusing book to journal in and will probably post at least a few times about the contents I find! Feeling bolstered, I decided I would do something bold and new. That book anxiety I mentioned branches out to food, too. I just generally don’t enjoy trying anything new.

Today, I did try something new. Well new-ish. I love matcha smoothies but have never had a hot matcha drink so opted to get a matcha green tea soy milk latte (this is verbatim from the menu, I would have never been able to formulate that order on my own). I walked around with this drink for 45 minutes before I worked up the courage to try a sip.

It was delicious! I audibly said “well this is delightful” which made the nearby staff member giggle. It was indeed delightful and I’m glad I tried it!

Running low on time, I begrudgingly made my way up to the check out registers. I felt so peaceful and happy. I could have stayed there all day long. It made me miss working in a bookstore (I don’t miss the working in a bookstore paycheck enough to do it again though).

Before the register I found a nice little display of mini books, also a weakness of mine. Nevertheless She Persisted was a must-have so I grabbed that and found some cute ball point pens with positive affirmations down the side. You Are Made of Stardust was the selling pen, I couldn’t just walk away without a reminder that I’m made of Star dust! Can you blame me?!

At the end of my trip, I made away with a nice little gift bag for myself and a delicious drink. I don’t usually take time for my own and this was a great reminder of why I should.

Today’s little reminder that me time is important is one I hopefully won’t let disappear soon. I walked out refreshed and ready for a productive work day!

What are your favorite places to haunt when you have free time? When was the last time you took time exclusively for your own?

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments and welcome to all my new readers!!

❤️